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Friday, June 30, 2006

Getting crazy-Launching one more blog

July 1st update:
1. This month and till Aug first week I'll be very busy. New project at office and couple fo exams to write, new technologies to learn. I'll be working on weekends to keep up my hobby. But expect a little delay in my response. Please bear with me. Thanks.
2. Many people are liking the idea of advt-check blog. I'll need your email ID to send invitation if you wish to join. If your blog profile doesn't display it or If I don't know you before please mail (Refer profile for mail ID)
so that I can send invi.

---Original Post begins-----

I think I'm getting mad.

Getting addicted to my passion, and going crazy over this blog stuff...

But since morning I'm wasting time reading others' blogs (and my own as well), and twelve in the night I'm in no mood to go home...As they say great things happen at midnight, an idea struck me...to create a platform to discuss various advertisements...I've to see where all these will take me...

what's there to discuss on advertisements?

Some ads are extremely creative and needs appreciation,
Some ads spread false message to the society,

Some ads do not speak truth and do not mean what they say,
Some ads have no logic and sense in them, and fail in their objective
Some ads are just a fun to watch/see
Some are misleading and have bad intentions/hidden agenda...


So why don't we discuss them all? If there can be movie reviews why not ad reviews? Every ad campaign launched involves lots of money, creativity,marketing strategy and counter strategy. I feel people may enjoy exchanging their thoughts on various commercials... Hence a new blog has been born:
http://advt-check.blogspot.com/

ಈ ಹೊಸ ಐಡಿಯಾಗೆ ಸ್ಪೂರ್ತಿ
ನೂರೆ೦ಟು ಸುಳ್ಳು ಬ್ಲಾಗ್. ಈ ಬ್ಲಾಗ್ ನಲ್ಲಿ ವಿವಿಧ ಪತ್ರಿಕೆಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಬರುವ ಲೇಖನದಲ್ಲಿರುವ ತಪ್ಪುಗಳನ್ನ ಹುಡುಕಿ ಅವನ್ನು ಸರಿಪಡಿಸುವ ಪ್ರಯತ್ನ ಮಾಡಲಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. (ರವಿ ಬೆಳೆಗೆರೆ ಪ್ರಕಾರ ಈ ಬ್ಗಾಗ್ ನ ಹೆಸರಿಗೆ ಸ್ಪೂರ್ತಿ ವಿಜಯ ಕರ್ನಾಟಕದಲ್ಲಿ ವಿಶ್ವೇಶ್ವರ ಭಟ್ಟರ "ನೂರೆ೦ಟು ಮಾತು" ಅ೦ಕಣ ) ಅದೇ ರೀತಿ ನಾನು ಜಾಹೀರಾತುಗಯ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಏಕೆ ಬರೆಯಬಾರದು ಎನ್ನಿಸಿತು.

I may not be able to handle this alone. I aim to create a team of fellow bloggers who wish join me in discussing different commercials. As a team member you'll be able to post at the above blog. You can take any ad you like and analyse it w.r.t parameters like creativity, truthfulness etc.

What say people? Those interested please mail/comment. I'll send invite.

Other than that, I've added couple of enhancements to my blog:

Now you can submit your email ID, and whenever I post a new post, you'll automatically get the entire post by email. I need not alert you and you need not visit my blog...Just read the content from your mailbox.

A digital clock, Google Adsense and a site visit counter have been added. It was my friend raveesh's (
raveeshkumar.com/ ) idea to add a visitor counter to blog. he asked how to add it, and while exploring that came across few more free tools on internet...Making use of that...

One of my friends asked this (it was yesterday, to be precise ) morning by mail: How do you manage to write such a long posts?

Its a passion for me. Since I enjoy creative writing, as long as I have something in mind and a medium to express that, I can go on telling that. Time and length don't bother me in this one aspect.

ಈ ಕೆಳಗಿನ ಬ್ಲಾಗ್ ಗಳನ್ನ ಅನುಕೂಲವಾದಾಗ ಓದಿ. ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿವೆ...

http://kannadablogs.blogspot.com/

http://sampada.net/

Came across one more interesting blog:
http://nychthemeron.blogspot.com/
I don't know the owner of this blog, but found that her writings and thoughts were interesting to read. She seems to have a huge reader base and fanfare...Taking some liberty and giving publicity to that blog. Hope no one complains.

There're so many bloggers around and everyone have something to say...

ನನ್ನ Rejection Handling ಬರಹದ ಕನ್ನಡ ಅನುವಾದ ಪ್ರಕಟಿಸೋಣ ಎ೦ದು ಹೊರಟೆ. ಯಾಕೋ ಬೇರೆ ಆಲೋಚನೆಗಳು ಬ೦ದು ಆ ವಿಚಾರ ಮೂಲೆಗು೦ಪಾಯಿತು. ಆಗಾಗ ಕನ್ನಡದಲ್ಲೂ ಬರೆಯಬೇಕು ಎ೦ದು ಮನಸ್ಸು ಹಾತೊರೆಯುತ್ತದೆ ಆದರೆ ಟೈಪಿಸಲು ಕುಳಿತರೆ ಆಲಸ್ಯ... ಏನಾದರೂ ಮಾಡಬೇಕು...


1:32 in the morning... Too much of blogging. Have some work to finish and then, if possible, go home. Friend and cousin Sandesh (
http://kannadigaa.blogspot.com/ ) has sent couple of dozen forwards, have to look into them too...

Salary Day people...enjoy and have a great weekend. And happy New Month...(Six months of new year already lost...)




your's
Nidhi.
Note: Non Kannada people request to ignore the special character you're seeing above...



June 2007 Update: That new blog stands somewhat abandoned, as I'm finding it difficult to focus on two two blogs. I was expecting some posts from team members but appears they are also busy. I've manages a PR of 3 for this blog wish I could achieve something similar to advt-check as well..

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Rejection Handling-Causes and Remedy

The great response I received for “why we lie” has motivated me to think and write one more similar topic. Rejection Handling.

Rejection Handling…Causes and Remedy

All of us face rejection in many phases of our life. From school admission to job interview, from marriage proposal to loan request, we encounter rejections of various types in our day to day life. Whatever be the cause of rejection, the general impact is that we feel disappointed and repeated rejection leads us to depression.

In this post I'm making an attempt to analyze the cause and possible solutions to over come different kinds of rejection.

Rejection type 1: Theory of relativity: This is applicable to situations like job interviews and marriage proposals. The vacancies are few (in the later case its just one) and aspirants are many. In this situation if you're rejected it's more because of the fact that there were other candidates who were considered more eligible for the post than because you were not good enough. When competition is high the selector enjoys the advantage-he/she can select the best. No body wants second best. If you sit back and cry (or in worst cases commit suicide) because you were rejected by a company or an individual, no one will give a damn.

Above situation can be overcome by any of these three strategies or a combination of them: 1. Enhance your competency, skills and other decisive factors so as to beat the competition 2. Find alternate or Compromise and settle for a lesser target 3. May be the other person failed to recognize your potential. Market yourself better.

Rejection Type 2: Perception and attitudes: Some rejections are because of pre set mindsets and notion of people. "He's a mechanical engineer and may not be able to code well", "last year he had an accident, it may not be safe to hand over the car keys to him", "if I receive his call he may ask for favors, better avoid speaking to him" All these rejections are based on some assumptions/beliefs and other factors for which you may not be responsible directly.

It takes consistent efforts to convince someone and change the way they look at you. They'll stop rejecting you only after they're fully satisfied with your abilities.

Rejection Type 3: Rules and Regulations: Some of the rejections are simply because of non compliance with some of the guidelines/rules/regulations/policies etc. Your leave request is likely to be rejected if you have no leave balance. To overcome these, you either reposition yourself to comply with the norms or find a way to trespass them (often done illegally and not advised).

Rejection Type 4: Purely Personal. Some rejections are purely due to personal reasons. The other person may just not be interested in you or has a bad impression on you or other compulsions or any other possible personal reasons because of which he/she might be rejecting you/your request. Very few straight forward people say NO directly and generally give a genuine reason. Most others give a clue that their response will be negative by their words and action. It's up to you how you want to take the rejection and proceed. Some of the personal rejections can be turned around by adopting tactics like begging/external influence/force/pressure/temptation/threat/pleading etc. While you may be able to get things done by these tactics, repeated use of them (i.e. forcing someone to do something he/she doesn't like) can be harmful to the relationship. Depending on factors like the importance of the person, the criticality of the request being rejected, the level of dignity you want to maintain, available alternatives etc you can decide how you want to proceed. Sometime you can afford to ignore this rejection while sometime you can't. This kind of rejections is to be handled by your interpersonal and negotiation skills. Also introspecting yourself and rectifying mistakes/shortfalls from your side, if any will help reducing this kind of rejections.

Rejection Type 5: Incompetence: You're likely to be rejected if you don't meet certain expectations. Like you're expected to clear a test or else rejection is guaranteed. These days there're global standards for almost everything and if you don't meet certain expectations and benchmarks, you're out of the game. If you face this kind of rejection obviously you should focus on the benchmarks you've to meet and achieve it. No shortcuts.

Type 6: Over Expectation: In some situations, we expect things we don't deserve and when we don't get it feel rejected. Consider these: A lady colleague in your office speaks freely with you on office work and next day if you invite her to movie or dinner, and get rejected, that's not rejection. You just expected too much. When people are not bound to entertain us, and our expectations can't be justified, we should learn to respect the other person and his/her decisions. You never finished your work on time with expected efficiency and you expect a promotion-be prepared for rejection. No one will show pity if you make this kind of rejections public.

These are the six types I could categorize rejections into. Whatever is the type we definitely feel very sad and disappointed when we're rejected. We blame our fate, luck, time and almost anything and everything. We begin to hate those who reject us even though he/she may not have anything personal against us. Will that serve any purpose?

In general following are the actions one has to undertake post rejection:

Ask for feedback: Try to ask the person what made him/her reject you. Not all are bound to give right feedback but generally should be able to grasp couple of points that lead to your rejection. Take stock. Sit back and introspect yourself. There may be something you seriously lack in you, you might have committed some mistakes, your strategies and approach may need a correction, you may not have enough preparation/practice identify the key reason Reassure yourself: Rejection is not the end of everything. They're an opportunity to identify your deficiencies and improve upon. You need a job, someone needs an employee. Finding each other may take some time, that's all. Restore your confidence Reposition yourself: Work on the key areas you identified in step
2. As far as possible overcome your deficiencies and ensure that you don't repeat the mistakes.

Your success depends largely on how you handle rejections. Most of the people who're successful today have sustained heavy criticism and rejections in the beginning. It's important that you don't loose your hope and let the rejection lower your self confidence. The train called life keeps moving. If you enter a wrong compartment you just change the compartment at next station. No need to jump out of train



Thanks for reading. If you've liked the above post, you might like following similar posts as well:Check them out:
Why people lie?
How Busy is too busy?

Pleasant surprise

This Monday morning I was in for a pleasant surprise. I was going through The Hindu Business Line and was reading Swathi CA’s column. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I read my name and blog url in the article. She was referring to a feedback I (and other readers) gave on her previous week’s writing. online edition of the column: http://www.thehindubusinessline.com/mentor/2006/06/26/stories/2006062600431300.htm

The biggest motivation for a writer is that there’re people who’re willing to read what he/she writes. Add to that the publicity in a national newspaper and he/she won’t be on grounds. I was literally floating on air for few hours on Monday morning.

There’s nothing worth boasting about all these but I was really happy yesterday. Last time my name was in media was way back in 2004 April when my article was published in Vijaya Karnataka. Two years is a really long time.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

ನಾವ್ಯಾಕೆ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳ್ತೇವೆ?

English version of this post is available here. It took me six hours of effort to translate 3 page document to Kannada (Since it was first time). My efforts will be fruitful if you can enjoy reading the post.

ನಾವ್ಯಾಕೆ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳ್ತೇವೆ?

ನಾವೆಲ್ಲರು ಜೀವನದಲ್ಲಿ ಆಗಾಗ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುತ್ತಿರುತ್ತೇವೆ- ಕೆಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ ಅನಿವಾರ್ಯತೆಇ೦ದ ಇನ್ನು ಕೆಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ ಸದುದ್ದೇಶದಿ೦ದ.

ನಾವ್ಯಾಕೆ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳ್ತೇವೆ ಅನ್ನೋ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ನನ್ನ ವಿಚಾರಧಾರೆಯನ್ನ ಮ೦ಡಿಸುವುದು ಈ ಬರಹದ ಉದ್ದೇಶ. ಯಾರನ್ನೂ ಹ೦ಗಿಸುವುದಕ್ಕಾಗಲಿ ಅಥವಾ ಅವಮಾನಪಡಿಸಲಾಗಲೀ ಇದನ್ನು ಬರೆಯುತ್ತಿಲ್ಲ. ಓದುಗರು ಇಲ್ಲಿನ ಬರಹವನ್ನು ವಯಕ್ತಿಕವಾಗಿ ಪರಿಗಣಿಸಬಾರದು.

ನಾನಿಲ್ಲಿ ಹೇಳಹೊರಟಿರುವುದು ಗುರು ಶಿಷ್ಯರ ನಡುವಿನ ಅಥವಾ ನೌಕರ ಮೇಲಧಿಕಾರಿ ನಡುವೆ ಬಳಸಲ್ಪಡುವ ಸುಳ್ಳನ್ನಲ್ಲ. ನಾವು ನಮ್ಮ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರ ಜೊತೆ, ಸಹೋದ್ಯೋಗಿಗಳ ಮೇಲೆ ಪ್ರಯೋಗಿಸುವ ಸುಳ್ಳನ್ನ. ಸಾಮಾನ್ಯವಾಗಿ ಇಲ್ಲಿ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುವುದು ಸದುದ್ದೇಶದಿ೦ದ (ಇನ್ನೊಬ್ಬರನ್ನು ಅಪ್ರಿಯವಾದ ಸತ್ಯ ಹೇಳಿ ನೋಯಿಸಬಾರದು ಎ೦ದು) ಆದರೆ ಹೆಚ್ಚಿನ ಸ೦ದರ್ಭಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಈ ಸುಳ್ಳುಗಳು ಅಪ್ರಿಯ ಸತ್ಯಕ್ಕಿ೦ತ ಹೆಚ್ಚು ನೋವನ್ನು೦ಟು ಮಾಡುತ್ತವೆ.
ಈ ಕೆಳಗಿನ ಉದಾಹರಣೆಗಳನ್ನು ಗಮನಿಸಿ:


ಉದಾ ೧:
ನಾನು: ನೀವು ನನ್ನ ಬ್ಲಾಗ್ ಗಳನ್ನ ಓದಿದ್ದೀರಾ?
ಅವನು/ಳು:ಹೌದು. ಬಹಳ ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿ ಬರೆದಿದ್ದೀರಿ.
ನಾನು: ಯಾವ ಪೋಸ್ಟ್ ನಿಮಗೆ ಇಷ್ಟವಾಯ್ತು?
ಅವನು/ಳು: ಅದು... ಅದು... ನಾನು ಪೂರ್ತಿಯಾಗಿ ಓದಿಲ್ಲ, ಹೀಗೆ ಮೇಲೆ ಮೇಲೆ ನೋಡಿದೆ ಅಷ್ಟೆ...
ಮೇಲಿನ ಉದಾಹರಣೆಯಲ್ಲಿ "ನಾನು ಓದಲಿಲ್ಲ/ನನಗೆ ಓದಲು ಸಮಯ ಸಿಗಲಿಲ್ಲ/ಒ೦ದೆರಡು ಲೈನ್ ಓದಿದೆ-ಮು೦ದೆ ಓದಲು ಆಸಕ್ತಿ ಬರಲಿಲ್ಲ" ಎ೦ದು ನಿಜ ಹೇಳಬಹುದಾಗಿತ್ತಾದರು ಅನವಶ್ಯಕವಾಗಿ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳಲಾಯಿತು.

ಉದಾಹರಣೆ ೨:
ನಾನು: ಈ ಭಾನುವಾರ ಶೇಷಾದ್ರಿ ಮೆಮೋರಿಯಲ್ ಹಾಲ್ ನಲ್ಲಿ ನಡೆಯಲಿರುವ ಕ್ವಿಜ಼್ ಕಾರ್ಯಕ್ರಮದಲ್ಲಿ ನನ್ನೊಡನೆ ಭಾಗವಹಿಸಲು ಬರುತ್ತೀರ್ರಾ?
ಮೇಲಿನ ಪ್ರಶ್ನೆಗೆ "ಹೌದು ಬರುತ್ತೇನೆ" ಅಥವಾ "ಇಲ್ಲ ಬರುವುದಿಲ್ಲ" ಎ೦ದು ಉತ್ತರ ಅವಶ್ಯಕ. ಏಕೆ೦ದರೆ ಆ ಉತ್ತರವನ್ನಾಧರಿಸಿ ಮು೦ದಿನ ಕೆಲಸವನ್ನು ನಿರ್ಧರಿಸಬೇಕಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. ಆದರೆ ನಮ್ಮಲ್ಲಿ ಅನೇಕರು ನೇರ ಉತ್ತರ ಕೊಡುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. ಬದಲಾಗಿ "ಆಮೇಲೆ ಹೇಳುತ್ತೇನೆ" , "ನಾನು ಬ೦ದರೂ ಬರಬಹುದು" , "ಬರಲು ಪ್ರಯತ್ನಿಸುತ್ತೇನೆ" ಇತ್ಯಾದಿ ನಿಖರವಲ್ಲದ ಉತ್ತರಗಳು ಸಿಕ್ಕಾಗ ಆಹ್ವಾನಿಸಿದ ತಪ್ಪಿಗೆ ನಮ್ಮನ್ನೆ ನಾವು ಶಪಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳಬೇಕಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. ಏಕೆ೦ದರೆ ಈ ರೀತಿ ಉತ್ತರ ನೀಡುವವರನ್ನು "ಬರುತ್ತಾರೆ" ಎ೦ದು ನ೦ಬುವ೦ತಿಲ್ಲ, ಬರುವುದಿಲ್ಲ ಎ೦ದು ಕಡೆಗಣಿಸುವ೦ತಿಲ್ಲ.

ಉದಾಹರಣೆ ೩: ನನ್ನ ಪರಿಚಿತರೊಬ್ಬರು ತಮ್ಮ ಸ್ವ೦ತದ / ತಮ್ಮ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರ ಮೊಬೈಲ್ ದೂರವಾಣಿ ಸ೦ಖ್ಯೆಯನ್ನು ನನ್ನನ್ನು ಹೊರತುಪಡಿಸಿ ಉಳಿದ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರಿಗೆಲ್ಲಾ ನೀಡಿದ್ದರು. ಬಹಳ ದಿನಗಳ ನ೦ತರ ಇದು ನನ್ನ ಗಮನಕ್ಕೆ ಬ೦ತು: ನಾನವರಿಗೆ ವಿ-ಅ೦ಚೆ ಕಳಿಸಿ ನಿಮ್ಮ ಹತ್ತಿರ ಮೊಬೈಲ್ ಇದೆಯಾ? ಅಥವಾ ಮೊಬೈಲ್ ಮೂಲಕ ನಿಮ್ಮನ್ನು ಸ೦ಪರ್ಕಿಸುವುದು ಸಾಧ್ಯವೆ? ಎ೦ದು ಕೇಳಿದೆ. ಅವರು "ನಿನಗೆ ನನ್ನ ಸ೦ಪರ್ಕ ಸ೦ಖ್ಯೆ ನೀಡಲು ಮರೆತು ಹೋಯಿತು/ ನಿಮಗೆ ನನ್ನ ನ೦ಬರ್ ಕೊಡಲು ನನಗೆ ಇಷ್ಟವಿರಲಿಲ್ಲ" ಎ೦ದು ಹೇಳಿದ್ದರೆ ಸಾಕಾಗುತ್ತಿತ್ತು. ಆದರೆ ನನ್ನ ಬಳಿ ಮೊಬೈಲ್ ಇರಲೇ ಇಲ್ಲ/ನನ್ನನ್ನು ದೂರವಾಣಿ ಮೂಲಕ ಸ೦ಪರ್ಕಿಸುವುದು ಸಾಧ್ಯವೇ ಇರಲಿಲ್ಲ ಎ೦ದು ಅವರು ಸಾಧಿಸಲು ಹೊರಟಾಗ ಬೇಸರವಾಗುತ್ತದೆ.

ನಾವು ನಿಜವನ್ನು ಹೇಳಬಹುದಾಗಿದ್ದಾಗಲೂ ಅನವಶ್ಯಕವಾಗಿ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳಿದ ಕೆಲವು ಉದಾಹರಣೆಗಳಿವು.

ನೀವು ಕೇಳಬಹುದು: ಇದರಲ್ಲಿ ಅ೦ಥಾ ತಲೆಕೆಡಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳುವ೦ಥದ್ದೇನಿದೆ? ಈ ಸಣ್ಣ ಪುಟ್ಟ ಸುಳ್ಳುಗಳಿ೦ದ ಯಾರಿಗೆ ಏನು ನಷ್ಟ?

ಸ್ನೇಹ ಎನ್ನುವುದು ಪರಸ್ಪರ ನ೦ಬಿಕೆ, ವಿಶ್ವಾಸದ ಮೇಲೆ ನಿ೦ತಿದೆ. ಈ ದೇಶದ ಯಾವುದೇ ಕಾನೂನು ಸ್ನೇಹದ ಮೇಲೆ ಅನ್ವಯಿಸುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರ ನಡುವಿನ ಜಗಳವನ್ನು ಕೋರ್ಟನಲ್ಲಿ ನಿರ್ಣಯಿಸಲಾಗುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. (ಅದು ಸಿವಿಲ್ /ಕ್ರಿಮಿನಲ್ ರೂಪದ್ದಾಗಿರದಿದ್ದರೆ). ನಿಮ್ಮ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತ/ಸ್ನೇಹಿತೆ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳಿದರೆ ಅವನ/ಅವಳ ಮೇಲೆ ಭಾರತೀಯ ದ೦ಡ ಸ೦ಹಿತೆ ( Indian Penal Conde (IPC) ಯ ಯಾವ ಕಾಲಮ್ ಕೂಡ ಅನ್ವಯಿಸುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. ನೀನು ಹೇಳಿದ್ದು ಸುಳ್ಳು ಎ೦ದು ನೀವು ಸಾಬೀತು ಪಡಿಸಲು ಹೋರಟರೆ ಸ್ನೇಹ ಇನ್ನಷ್ಟು ಕೆಡುತ್ತದೆ. ತಾ೦ತ್ರಿಕವಾಗಿ ಅಥವಾ ಕಾನೂನಿನ ಪ್ರಕಾರ ನಿಮ್ಮ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರ ಮೇಲೆ ನಿಮಗೆ ಯಾವ ಅಧಿಕಾರವೂ ಇಲ್ಲ. ಹಾಗಾಗಿ ಕೋಪಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳುವುದರಲ್ಲಿ ಅರ್ಥವಿಲ್ಲ.

ಒಮ್ಮೆ ಆಲೋಚಿಸಿ ನೋಡಿ.

ಕೆಲವರು ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುವುದು ಇತರರಿಗೆ ಬೇಜಾರಗದಿರಲಿ ಎ೦ದು. ಇವರ ಉದ್ದೇಶ ಒಳ್ಳೆಯದೇ ಆದರೂ ಧೀರ್ಘಾವದಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಇದರಿ೦ದ ಹಾನಿಯೇ ಹೆಚ್ಚು.
ಇನ್ನು ಕೆಲವರು ನೇರವಾಗಿ ನಕಾರಾತ್ಮಕ ಉತ್ತರ ನೀಡಲು ಇಷ್ಟವಿಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದಾಗ/ಸಾಧ್ಯವಿಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದಾಗ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುತ್ತಾರೆ. ನಿನ್ನೊಡನೆ ಬರಲು ನನಗೆ ಇಷ್ಟವಿಲ್ಲ ಎ೦ದು ನೇರವಾಗಿ ಹೇಳುವ ಬದಲು ಹ೦ತ ಹ೦ತವಾಗಿ ತಮ್ಮ ಅಪ್ರಿಯತೆಯನ್ನು ಸಾದರಪಡಿಸುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಇ೦ತವರು ಮೊದಲನೆಯದಾಗಿ ತಮ್ಮ ಉತ್ತರ ನೀಡಲು ಸಾಕಷ್ಟು ಸಮಯ ತೆಗೆದುಕೊಳ್ಳುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಕೊನೆಗೆ "ನನಗೆ ನಿಜವಾಗಿಯೂ ಇಷ್ಟವಿತ್ತು ಆದರೆ ಸಾಧ್ಯವಾಗಲಿಲ್ಲ" ಎ೦ದು ಹಲವು ಕಾರಣ (ನೆಪ) ಗಳನ್ನು ನೀಡುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಆಸಕ್ತಿಯ ಕೊರತೆಯಿ೦ದ ಇವರು ನಕಾರಾತ್ಮಕ ಪ್ರತಿಕ್ರಿಯೆ ನೀಡುತ್ತಿರುವುದು ಗಮನಕ್ಕೆ ಬ೦ದರೆ ಇ೦ತವರನ್ನು ಪ್ರಯತ್ನಪೂರ್ವಕವಾಗಿ ಒಪ್ಪಿಸುವುದರಲ್ಲಿ ಅರ್ಥವಿಲ್ಲ.

ಈಗಾಗಲೇ ಹೇಳಿದ ಸುಳ್ಳನ್ನು ಸಮರ್ಥಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳಲು ಅಥವಾ ತಾವು ಮಾಡಿದ ತಪ್ಪನ್ನು ಮುಚ್ಚಿ ಹಾಕಲು ಕೆಲವರು ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಈ ರೀತಿ ಮು೦ದಾಲೋಚನೆ ಇಲ್ಲದೆ ಹೇಳಿದ ಸಾಲು ಸಾಲು ಸುಳ್ಳುಗಳು ಯಾರನ್ನೇ ಆದರೂ ತೀವ್ರ ತೊ೦ದರೆಗೆ ಸಿಲುಕಿಸಬಲ್ಲವು. ಈ ತೆರನಾದ ಸುಳ್ಳುಗಳನ್ನು ಹೇಳದಿರುವುದು, ಹೇಳದೇ ಇರುವ೦ತೆ ಇತರರನ್ನು ಪ್ರೋತ್ಸಾಹಿಸುವುದು ಕ್ಷೇಮ.

ಕೆಲವರು ತಮ್ಮ ಒಣ ಪ್ರತಿಷ್ಟೆಗೋಸ್ಕರ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಒ೦ದು ರೀತಿ ಜ೦ಭ ಕೊಚ್ಚಿಕೊಳ್ಳೋರು. ಇವರೊಡನೆ ವಾದ ಮಾಡಿ ಏನು ಉಪಯೋಗವಿಲ್ಲ.

ದುರುದ್ದೇಶದಿ೦ದ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುವವರದು ಇನ್ನೋ೦ದು ಪ೦ಗಡ. ಇವರು ನ೦ಬಿಕೆ ಹುಟ್ಟಿಸಲು ಬೇಕಾದಷ್ಟು ತಯಾರಿ ನಡೆಸಿಯೇ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುವುದರಿ೦ದ ಪತ್ತೆ ಹಚ್ಚುವುದು ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ಕಷ್ಟ. ಇ೦ತಹ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಈ ಬ್ಲಾಗ್ ನ ವ್ಯಾಪ್ತಿಯೊಳಗೆ ಬರುವುದಿಲ್ಲ.

ಇವೆಲ್ಲವಕ್ಕೆ ಅಪವಾದವೆ೦ಬ೦ತೆ ಕೆಲವರು ತಮ್ಮ ಮಾತಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಮತ್ತು ವ್ಯಕ್ತಿತ್ವದಲ್ಲಿ ಅತ್ಯ೦ತ ಪ್ರಾಮಾಣಿಕತೆ ಮತ್ತು ನೇರ ನಡೆ ನುಡಿ ಕಾಪಾಡಿಕೊ೦ಡಿರುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಇವರ ಮಾತುಗಳು ಕೇಳಲು ಕೆಲವೊಮ್ಮೆ ಅಪ್ರಿಯವೆನಿಸಿದರೂ ನಿಜಸ್ಥಿತಿಯನ್ನು ಪ್ರತಿಬಿ೦ಬಿಸುತ್ತದೆ.

ಉದಾ: ೧: ನಿನ್ನ ಬ್ಲಾಗ್ ಎರಡು ಪ್ಯಾರಾ ಓದುವುದರಲ್ಲಿ ಬೇಜಾರು ತರಿಸಿತು, ಹಾಗಾಗಿ ಅಲ್ಲಿಗೇ ನಿಲ್ಲಿಸಿದೆ.
೨: ಹೋದ ವಾರ ನೀನಾಡಿದ ಈ ಮಾತಿನಿ೦ದ ನನ್ನ ಮನಸ್ಸಿಗೆ ನೋವಾಯಿತು, ಹಾಗಾಗಿ ನಿನ್ನ ಇ-ಮೇಲ್ ಗೆ ಉತ್ತರಿಸಲಿಲ್ಲ.
೩: ಈ ಕೆಲಸಕ್ಕಾಗಿ ನೀನು ವ್ಯಯಿಸಿದ ಶ್ರಮವನ್ನು ನಾನು ಅಭಿನ೦ದಿಸುತ್ತೇನೆ, ಆದರೆ ಕೆಲಸದ ಗುಣಮಟ್ಟ ಇನ್ನೂ ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿರಬೇಕಾಗಿತ್ತು.

ಈ ರೀತಿಯ Constructive Criticism ನೀಡುವ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರು ಬಹಳ ಬೆಲೆ ಬಾಳುತ್ತಾರೆ. ನಮ್ಮ ತಪ್ಪು ತಿದ್ದಿಕೊ೦ಡು ನಮ್ಮನ್ನು ನಾವು ಉತ್ತಮಪಡಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳಲು ಇ೦ತಹ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರು ಬಹಳ ಅವಶ್ಯಕ.

ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳುವ ಮೊದಲು ಸಾಕಷ್ಟು ತಯಾರಿ, ಮು೦ದಾಲೋಚನೆ ಮಾದಬೇಕಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. ಹೇಳುವ ಸುಳ್ಳಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಒ೦ದು consistency maintain ಮಾಡಬೇಕಾಗುತ್ತದೆ. ಈಗಿನ ಮಾಹಿತಿ ಯುಗದಲ್ಲಿ ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮಾತನ್ನು ಪರೀಕ್ಷಿಸಿ ನೋಡಲು ಯಾವ ಪತ್ತೇದಾರಿಕೆಯೂ ಬೇಡ. ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮಾತಿನ ಸಾ೦ಧರ್ಬಿಕ ಪರಾಮರ್ಶೆ ಮತ್ತು ಲಭ್ಯವಿರುವ ಮಾಹಿತಿ ಮೂಲಗಳ ಬಳಕೆಯಿ೦ದ ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮಾತಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಸತ್ಯಾ೦ಶವೆಷ್ಟಿದೆ ಎ೦ದು ತಿಳಿದುಕೊಳ್ಳಬಹುದು. ನಿಮ್ಮ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಎಷ್ಟೇ ಚಿಕ್ಕದಾಗಿದ್ದರೂ ಯಾರಾದರೂ ಅದನ್ನು ಗಮನಿಸದೇ ಇರುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. ನಿಮ್ಮ ಸುಳ್ಳಿನಿ೦ದ ಯಾವ ಅನಾಹುತವೂ ಆಗಲಿಕ್ಕಿಲ್ಲ ಆದರೆ ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮೇಲೆ ಇತರರು ಇಟ್ಟ ನ೦ಬಿಕೆ, ವಿಶ್ವಾಸಕ್ಕೆ ಅದೊ೦ದು ಕೊಡಲಿ ಪೆಟ್ಟಾಗುತ್ತದೆ.

ಈ ಪೋಸ್ಟ್ ನ ಆ೦ಗ್ಲ ಅನುವಾದಕ್ಕಾಗಿ ಇಲ್ಲಿ ಕ್ಲಿಕ್ಕಿಸಿ

Monday, June 19, 2006

Why We Lie? ನಾವ್ಯಾಕೆ ಸುಳ್ಳು ಹೇಳ್ತೇವೆ?

ಈ ಪೋಸ್ಟ್ ನ ಕನ್ನಡ ಅನುವಾದಕ್ಕಾಗಿ ಇಲ್ಲಿ ಕ್ಲಿಕ್ಕಿಸಿ.[To read this post in Kannada Language click here]

Disclaimer: This post doesn't intend to hurt any one who might have lied me/others. This is just an introspection from my view point. Please don't take this personally.

Most of us lie on different occasions, either out of compulsion or out of instinct.

This post gives my opinion on why people lie and why we don’t avoid it.

I’m NOT referring to lies told to our superiors: like student telling teacher why he couldn’t finish the assignment on time or an employee explaining his boss why he couldn’t come to office the other day. I’m referring to peer to peer lies we use in course of daily business with our friends/colleagues etc. Such lies are often executed with good intention (like Not to hurt the other by telling real truth, which may not be pleasant to hear), however they may hurt more than the bitter truth when you detect that someone you trusted did lie to you.

Consider some of these situations:

Abbreviations

I: myself
R: Respondent (my friend/colleague/relative/others as the case may be)

Case 1:
I: Did you read my blog?
R: Ya. Its good. I liked it
I: Which post you liked most?
R: Err…I just glanced through…Didn’t read in details…They’re good
Comment:
Now a simple and straight forward answer could have been any of the following:
a. "I didn’t find enough time to read them" or
b. "I read first two lines and stopped as it was not interesting/I’d no time…" or
c."The design of blog is good but I have no patience to read all those stuff "
But very few people give real opinion.

Case 2:
I: Will you join me for that quiz competition this Sunday at Sheshadri Memorial Hall?

Expected answer for questions of above type is Boolean:

Yes I’m coming or
No I’m not coming. (With reasons being fully optional)

That simplifies the process and I’ll be able to proceed with the plan. But many people do not wish to say NO and hence they cause us much more inconvenience by making statements like “I’m not sure”, “I’ll see”, “I’ll let you know”, “I’ll tell you later” etc.
This kind of indecisive statements put the other person in great trouble-I can neither count them in and proceed, nor count them out and find an alternative. And most of these statements eventually result in “NO”.


To avoid inconvenience of above type I started keeping things formal: This is the deal, this is what is expected from you, and I need your response before this date and time, beyond which I’ll count you out and proceed.

Though this approach is not appreciated by many, it simplifies the process for me.

Case 3

Background: I came to know accidentally that one of old friends was accessible by a mobile number. But he/she had never given me the number. So I mailed and asked:
“Are you /were you accessible by means of a mobile number?”

Expected answer was:
1. Yes I was accessible by a mobile number (mine/friend’s/room-mate’s) and, (I don’t want to give you/I forgot to give you) OR
2. it’s none of your business, I’m not bound to disclose.

But when the other person tries to prove that he/she was not accessible by a mobile number, it hurts.

Above are three examples when someone did lie while he/she could’ve spoken out the genuine answer.

So what? What is the big deal if someone tells some simple harmless lies?


Friendship is built on trust and respect for each other. There’re no laws applicable on friendship and the disputes arising among friends can’t be taken to court unless there’s a civil/criminal offense. If someone tells you a simple lie, there’s nothing you can do. There’s no binding agreement that your friend should speak nothing but truth. Even if you manage to prove that he/she lied, there’s no section in Indian Penal Code (IPC) that can be applied in this situation. So what will you do? If you try to fight with your friend trying to prove that he/she lied, you’ll only worsen the situation. Technically or legally you have no authority over your friend and you can’t get angry either.

Sit back and take stock.

Sometimes people lie because they don’t want to appear harsh and hurt you. Their intention will be good but over a period of time this kind of lies will have negative effect
(Like telling someone he/she is a good singer while the truth is otherwise. In long run can these lies do spoil you) In these situations if the person is close enough then you may sit and tell him/her not to lie and give his/her true opinion/genuine feedback. In other cases it makes better sense to ignore these lies.

People also lie because they don’t want to reject you/your request outright. When they hesitate to say an outright “NO” they choose to kill you in phases. First they buy time in giving their response, and then finally when it turns out to be negative, they give wide range of excuses as to why “they were interested but couldn’t make it” When you identify that the other person is just not interested, your best bet would be to withdraw. You may succeed making them say “Yes” but that induced interest/acceptance will be more because of your begging/pressure/force/temptation/threat than from their heart. In my opinion it would be better if we identify this threshold and abandon the pursuit beyond that point. (For example, if someone doesn’t reply your mails for months while they’re online sending forwards, and doing other activities, the reason simple: They didn’t feel like mailing you. As simple as that- It’s just a matter of interest than anything else-say time/net access/convenience/workload etc (if Arcelor has turned down Mittal Steel's acquisition deal even after 70% premium, its just that Arcelor doesn't wish to sell itself to Mittal. It's neither money nor anything else)

Third kind of lies is “Damage Control” Lies. People lie to cover up some of their mistakes/previously told lies. Effect of these lies compound fast and a series of unplanned lies can put people in deep trouble. In this situation it helps to make it crystal clear to people that you’re not buying their lies and tell them that truth will be their best option.

One more kind of lie is “Ego Lie”. People lie just to keep their self esteem high. Like boasting that: “I was on a business trip to Delhi last week” If you prove in front of a group that this person lied (i.e he didn't go to Delhi last week), he/she will find it too hard to digest the insult. Since they’re totally harmless, ignore them. But make an entry of these lies, as it may come handy in future.

Last kind of lies are lies told with bad intention. These are hard to detect because those who lie with bad intentions usually come with enough preparations to convince you that they're speaking truth, and takes a while before you realize that they betrayed you. Discussing this kind of lies is out of scope of this post at this moment.

On the contrary I’ve come across very few people who’re extremely honest in their statements and straight forward in their approach:

Consider these feedbacks:
1.“I stopped reading so and so post after first two paragraphs as it was not interesting
2. The logic you adopted in this program is excellent but you could’ve implemented it in a much better way
3. I was upset with you for so and so reason, hence I didn’t reply your mail last week

4. Nobody likes your formal mails...Why don't you change your strategy?

These kinds of statements are tough to digest in one attempt, and you may not appreciate the person who said that. But when you sit back and analyze you’ll no doubt respect such persons because they tell you where you're wrong and what you should focus on. Unless you admit the truth and rectify from your end you can’t progress and had it not been for people like this, you’d have never come across your mistakes.

You should treasure your friends who give you a constructive criticism.


A small story to end the post:

Four friends had a party previous night and were late to college next day, wherein they had an exam to take. Since they were late they couldn’t take the exam. They met principal and requested for the permission to write that exam the next day. On being asked why they’re late they told they went to village for cremation of one of their grand mother and on their way back the car had a flat tyre, hence they couldn’t report on time.

Principal agreed and next day they were made to sit in four different rooms and question papers were handed over. It had only 2 questions:
1. What’s your name? 1Mark
2. Which wheel of the car got punctured? 99 Marks


If you’ve to lie, you need lot of planning and preparation. You need to maintain consistency in your lie and you may need supplementary evidence to support your lie. If you can't manage these, I advice avoid telling lie and be honest in your words as far as possible. In this information world it doesn’t take 007 style spying to cross check the information. Simple analytical/logical analysis of the statements made, and if necessary a quick reference to public/private source of information is all it takes to see if a person means what he/she says. If you lie some one is bound to detect it. One may not make an issue out of your lie or announce it to everyone. But it seriously hampers your credibility and image. The fact remains in someone’s mind that you lied and hence can’t be fully trusted. Your lie may not create any catastrophe but your simple lies when repeated time and again will slowly spoil the relationship.

Keep in mind you always have an option to say "NO Comments".

Comments are welcome. Again above is not meant to hurt anyone.


ಈ ಪೋಸ್ಟ್ ನ ಕನ್ನಡ ಅನುವಾದಕ್ಕಾಗಿ ಇಲ್ಲಿ ಕ್ಲಿಕ್ಕಿಸಿ.[To read this post in Kannada Language click here]


Thanks for reading. If you've liked the above post, you might like following similar posts as well:Check them out:
Rejection Handling
How Busy is Too Busy?

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Indian Education and IT attrition

This post is dedicated to my Reporting Manager who’s quitting his job and moving on to take greater challenges in another company.

Indian youth today can be broadly divided into three segments- One: Jobless graduates sitting idle hoping that their dream jobs will land in their hands one day, Two: Techies working for IT industry and MNCs jumping from job to job more frequently than our politicians changing parties. Three: Others who don’t fall into either of these two.

This post aims to compare the first two and gives my opinion on demand supply gap in talent market.

Why there’s one section of youth who have NO job while there’s another section whose skills are in such a demand that retaining them is a challenge to their employers?

This difference is mainly due to the fact that Industry finds that only a part of today’s graduates fresh out of college are employable. This is the single largest concern our education system should act upon today. Hence only a part of students are absorbed into the industry with a pay packages exceeding that of their parents while rest of the student community is left behind, feeling betrayed by the educational system.

Human aspirations never end (They should never end, lest there won’t be any achievements). At college our concern was to get placed in any company. Once placed comes “who’s giving more” analysis; where focus is diverted to secure multiple offer letters so that one can go for the best option. Once in job other ambitions take over-better designation, challenges, ownership, and higher pay so on. This is common across all levels from entry level to top management. Because of a huge gap between talent supply and demand, head hunters often target techies whose aspirations are not met in their present company, hence the high attrition rates in Industry.

While the other unattended half of student community finds it a lot embracing to take up conventional jobs, remunerations wherein are no where in comparison with that of their batch mates placed in IT companies.

Immediate focus should be given on this sector to make them competent enough and reduce the divide.

The first thing to be inculcated in every individual is “Dignity of Labor” which is very common to see in any developed countries. If I say I want work as a truck driver, hence I’ve obtained HTV license, people laugh at me, thinking I’m joking. The point is one should work. No matter what the nature of job is, to start with. One always has the option to switch jobs once the right moment comes. But we see that most of the people reject the job they get saying “this is too low for my potential”

Second goal should be to focus on practical application of knowledge. Our education system prepares us to face exams, not life. A 90% score in electrical engineering is no use if he/she can’t fix a ceiling fan. A gold medal in commerce is good for nothing if he/she can’t tell the difference between fixed interest and floating interest. I hold a mechanical engineering degree but end up paying 7th standard failed auto mechanic to fix my bike. So it’s essential to come out of “I should study to clear my exam” perspective and attain “I want to gain knowledge” attitude.

Third is to focus on global expectations. Industry needs people with communication skills, leadership abilities, open minded and innovative minds. The default Indian education system hardly considers any of the above as something important.


If above three are looked into, the proportion of employable graduates increases significantly and the demand supply gap narrows. Talent replacement becomes easy for HR people. This should eventually reduce the attrition rate as well.

While the best brains should be used for nation building activities in organizations like say ISRO, IISc etc, these brains often work on some billing software for a US supermarket (just an example). The inability to attract bright talents by these research organizations will eventually hinders the growth and prosperity of the nation, another factor that needs visionary attention.

Disclaimer: Above are fully my personal opinions.



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Monday, June 12, 2006

Summer of '05 : A modified poem

(With full respects to Bryan Adams and his title “Summer of ‘69”)

I had my first real job-hunt
When I was in 8th sem
Then I got into Satyam
It was the summer of ‘05

Me and some guys from school
Wanted a job and we tried real hard
Jimmy-Infy Jody got into Wipro
I had thought I would never get far

Oh when I look back now
That summer seemed to last forever
And if I had the choice
Ya-I’d always wanna be here
These are the best days in my life

Ain’t no use complaining
When you got a job to do
On the bench-or-in the Project
And that’s where I met you.

Backing us on every moment
It’s our Program Manager
She led us all the way
Her name is Swapna Mudholkar
These are the best days in my life…

Back in the summer of ‘05

Man we’re killing time
We’re young and restless
We need to unwind
I guess nothing can last forever forever…

And now the times are changing
Look at everything that’s come and gone
From school now we’re professional
Still a long long way to travel

Back in the summer of 05


Related: Award winning Kannada Mini poem and other articles

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Everyone Loot S/w Engineers!

Employees of IT and ITES industry have become primary targets of almost everyone involved in selling a service or goods. Because of notion that these people earn more, everyone takes for granted that they can pay more.

First to loot me was my college, which insisted that I must pay Rs.1000 before collecting my final year hall ticket because I got placed through my college. Then it was the turn of police officer, who wanted additional reward for speedy processing of my passport.

Then I shifted my base to Hyderabad, where my company is headquartered and where Satyam employees are treated as “millionaires to be” by everyone. Though we could remove our ID card to protect our identity, ironed shirts and polished shoes were more than enough for auto-wallas and others to guess our profession. Hyderabad autos were metered but they were not bound to follow that during early morning and late evenings, when we’d be on streets due to odd timings of our training. The only person who couldn’t over charge us was the conductor of State Road Transportation buses, who had to issue a ticket and the prices were fixed.

Chennai was still horrible. In Hyderabad, autos were metered and we could speak with them in Hindi, if we can’t speak Telugu. Chennai autos have no comparison in the way they loot their passengers. They decide price seeing your face and other factors like are you getting late for office or is it raining, than considering distance to be covered. A 6 km journey shouldn’t cost more than 50 Rs, but Chennai autos cost more than two and a half times that.

Next to rob me was the overpriced food court in Tidel Park (a building hosting a number of IT companies including the one I work for).

Last but not the least our companies loot us in a different way. Predominantly its our health and partially our personal and social life.

10 to 12 hours in front of computer a day, day after day will have a severe impact on health if not compensated with nutritious food and adequate exercise. Though the onus is on us to keep ourselves fit, we often ignore our health either due to laziness or in an attempt to climb higher up in corporate ladder. The high pay package can never bring back the lost health. Though I don’t want to blame companies fully on this what I wish to point out is that companies are not giving even 10% of emphasis on personal well being of its worker compared to the importance given to deliverables, deadlines and customer satisfaction.